Pineapple Dilemma

Well, hello there.

As I was having breakfast on the veranda overlooking the bay in Acapulco this afternoon, I saw this interesting email in my inbox:

    Hi, Bill.  My wife brought a pineapple home.  What do I do with it?

Now that’s an interesting question.  I’ve always been fascinated by pineapples.   I’ve been eating them from a can since I was a boy in Canada, but had never seen a real one until 1974.  I thought it was a leftover prop from my Star Trek days. After all, they look so … alien.  Almost threatening. I wouldn't be sure if you'd need to use a large peeler to remove the rind, or if it would be better to get a sharp knife and just start chopping.

Of course, there's good reason pineapples are so strange to us.  They're a foreign fruit.  They simply don't grow in North America. I mean, there are no great pineapple fields outside of Winnipeg, or endless pineapple groves in Iowa. We're used to wheat, apples, and corn.  The most bizzare fruit or vegetable we have here are grapes. So, it seems sensible to me that the best way to handle a pineapple is to ask a foreigner.  Luckily, I know George Takei, and it just feels like he would have an instinctive comfort with them.

So, my advice to you is to find yourself some Asian woman and ask her.

All my best.